PHOTO OF THE MONTH:
High-Flying Deer Mystery (Warning:
Photo is just a tad graphic)
If this were a reindeer, I'd be
inclined to believe that perhaps
Santa had a wee bit too much spiked
eggnog last Christmas and Rudolph
paid the ulitmate price. However,
being that it's an ordinary deer I'd
wager a guess that the train tracks
located a few feet away had more
than a little to do with it.
SITE OF THE MONTH:
Full-Color early 1900's Photographs
Color photography simply did not
exist in the early 1900s, but the
certain technique that photographer
Sergei Mikhailovich Prokudin-Gorskii
used in Russia at the
turn-of-the-century, enabled
present-day photographers to develop
his original negatives into full
color. The result is astounding.
These are some of the most beautiful
photographs I've ever seen. The
Ethnic Diversity photos are
particularly striking.
Absolutely Insane EBay Auct...err,
never mind...:
Take a look! Or at least, click and
take a quick peek from behind your
hands which should automatically
cover your eyes when I tell you this
link is Michael Jackson related!
I'm sorry to report that there is
no new Absolutely Insane EBay
Auction to feature this month.
Apparently, all the scary freaks on
EBay are taking a holiday vacation
and we've all seen enough "Ghost in
a Jar/Bottle/Box/Colostomy Bag" to
last us a looong while. Instead, I
am giving you something equally as
freaky to look at (and far more
frightening). I've featured this
page here before but I think it
deserves a second look considering
the events of the past week.
Spider-Goats Euthanized
Ah, those scientists and their
wacky sense of humor...what? It's
true? Spider-GOATS? Spider-GOATS?
What the hell are spider-goats?
Great, cross a spider with something
that has horns and sharp hooves and
produces web silk instead of milk.
Should we all be on the lookout for
eight-legged venomous goats hanging
in dark corners now?
Chocolate Santa?
Or a BOMB? In this day and time,
it certainly pays to be
overly-cautious. Or, as in this
case, paranoid bordering on
schitzophrenic.
Newborns accidentally switched in
hospital
How could this possibly still be
happening? Don't these people know
better? Have they never watched
Lifetime Channel Movies of the Week?
Speaking of paranoid and just plain
crazy...
A fascinating project is now
underway to transcribe the court
notes of the Salem Witch Trials. New
information is being uncovered
during the process, including the
fact that the youngest person to be
accused of witchcraft was all of 4
years old. Not exactly a bright spot
in our country's history, to say the
least.
Human killed by bird again
You know, there are some stories
that you would think would be a once
in a lifetime occurance, such as the
man killed by the angry magpie I
wrote about a couple of months ago.
But no, it's happened once again.
This time, an elderly widow
suffocated after a jackdaw built its
nest inside her house's chimney,
causing a build-up of carbon
monxoide. Yikes! Guess I better go
fill up my bird feeder in the front
yard before I'm next on the bird
hitlist.
Too bad Johnnie Cochran only works
for humans
A bear, innocently minding her
own business camping out doorways
and garages, was rudely evicted, not
just out of a town but out of the
entire state of Idaho.
Pack up all your "Welcome to Earth"
signs
The big alien landing planned at
a football game in Brazil has been
cancelled due to fears of alien
abduction.
This story just makes me laugh
Mental patient escapes from
hospital and wreaks havoc throughout
the town on a bulldozer.
Deer embarks on a life of crime
Woman hears someone breaking into
her home and hides in her bed under
the blankets listening as the
"burglar" ransacks the place. Turns
out to be a wayward deer.
Hey, maybe pot does make you stupid!
In quite possibly the only
fatality directly caused by
marijuana, a man dies after trying
to swallow his stash when he pulled
over by police.
Clever octopus puts "Finding Nemo"
to shame
Man in Peoria finds an tiny,
living octopus clinging to the side
of his toilet bowl. It is assumed
the the octopus was a pet that was
flushed down someone's toilet and
somehow managed to scramble its way
to safety through miles of sewer
pipe to exit in the man's bathroom.
And what happened to the plucky
little octopus? He was
unceremoniously dumped in the
trashcan.
In slowly breaking
not-that-important news:
Turns out that the extinction
date of the the Dodo bird was not in
the 1660's as scientists have always
thought, but actually in the 1690's.
But honestly, who really cares? It's
just 30 years. "There are reasons
for wanting this kind of
information," Solow [grumpy
scientist] said.
Alrighty, then!
And in Breaking Crackpot Theory
news:
From our friends at Pravada, of
course! A "scientist" claims that
the Earth is hollow and contains
Sun, Moon and another civilization.
Not sure exactly what he's talking
about, but apparently it has
something to do with ""Big gas
throwing out took place in the North
and South Poles. Deep big holes
aroused there."" At least I think
he's talking about the earth...
Trees are plotting to take over the
world by causing mass power outages
Or maybe it was just the power
company's failure to conduct proper
"vegetation management" that caused
the Northeast blackout this past
August. Take your pick. I personally
like the trees taking over the world
theory, but I guess the failed
"vegetation management" theory makes
more sense. At least we aren't
blaming Canada anymore.
We can put a man on the moon, clone
living beings, and even make cereal
that stays crispy in milk...
But we still don't understand how
gravity works. And, according to
this article, we may never
understand it.
Indian man goes 68 years without
drinking or eating
And after extensive testing, 400
doctors can't figure him out nor
prove him a fake. ""I get the elixir
of life from the hole in my palate,
which enables me to go without food
and water," Jani explained to AFP."
Hey, whatever works!
Raelians can reverse the aging
process!
Or so they'd have us believe. I'm
confused--if they've figured out how
to reverse the aging process then
why do they need to clone babies?
A woman, a man, a horse and a dog
walk into a park...
Nope, not a bad joke--this
actually happened. Bizarre and
gruesome incident involving a
policeman and his horse and a woman
and her pit bull.
I'm not sure what "Mexican Bologna"
is but I'm never buying any
A "bologna smuggler" was caught
trying to smuggle bologna across the
Mexican-U.S. border. He had cleverly
molded it into the shape of a
carseat and had kids sitting on it
to complete the illusion. Eww.
A stunning blow to the illegal
bologna trade, I'm sure.
Tired of turkey or ham for Christmas
dinner? Try something different this
year!
Like WHALE! Yes,
tasty and nutritious whale meat...bleech,
I can't even make fun of this story
without feeling nauseous.
Alien Hackers
Scientists with too much time on
their hands find something new to
worry about. Extraterristrials could
hack into SETI and spread around
disinformation and computer viruses
to the millions who have downloaded
SETI onto their computers. It seems
very possible--after all, as we saw
in Independence Day, invading alien
ships use Microsoft just like we
humans do.
Ooh, baby! Look at the humps on that
one!
Camel beauty contest. I really
don't need to say anything further.
Real horsepower makes a comeback in
Africa
Travelers in Africa have
abandoned cars and buses and have
started using horses to get through
the dense traffic in large cities.
"I am Azrael, dark ruler of the
Underworld, I have come to...OWW!
These handcuffs are pinching meeee!"
Vampire wannabes will have to
come up with creative ways to stay
out of the sun after being sentenced
to 12 months in prison for harassing
a vicar and his family.
And finally, not exactly weird but
definitely neccesary
The Dr. Suess Parody page! Scour
your brain clean of the disturbing
images of Mike Meyers as The Cat in
the Hat you've been bombarded with.
There's more original, funny
material in one page of this site
than there is in that entire
abomination they call a movie.
